Friday, February 18, 2011

It's not all about me......

"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else."
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I haven't blogged in a while, I know.  I think it's because my head hasn't been in the prettiest of places :o)  You would think that, being so close to the end of treatment, I'd be running around doing back flips.......not the case.  I guess that (not to sound cliche), when you get to the end, you can't help but think about the beginning.  Don't get me wrong, I am super excited about the end and I can't wait, but I can't help but think about all that has changed on the way.  I sometimes look in the mirror and feel like I am looking at a stranger.  Who is that girl with all the scars? Who is that girl with the dark circles under her eyes? Who is that girl who can barely stand up straight because she's so tired? Who's hair is this that all of a sudden decided to start falling out? What is that thing sticking out of her chest? WHO IS THAT GIRL? Then, I remember.....that girl is me.  Trust me, I am in no way looking for sympathy....that's the LAST thing I want.  I guess I'm just trying to get across that this sucks!! and it's OK to say it sucks!!  The thing is, it doesn't just suck for me.  I think I've been so wrapped up in my situation and what it has done to me and my life, I've forgotten that I am not the only person who has been changed by it.  I've said it before, I can't stand the fact that people (my fam especially) have had to make certain changes in their lives to make sure I was (am) getting what I needed.  Whether it was dropping everything to come to ATL for one of my surgeries, or changing their entire schedule around to ensure I never had to go to chemo alone, or even understanding that I don't feel like talking so I'm probably not going to answer the phone....people have made sacrifices for me and I pray you all know how eternally grateful I am....I LOVE U GUYS :o) I'm going to attempt to embrace all this change, it doesn't have to be a bad thing right??? Who knows where it'll take me, life is suppose to be a journey anyway.....that's what they tell me at least :o)))
On a lighter note.....I'M CANCER FREE, have 3 more rounds of chemo to go, and I finally made it out of my 20's!!!! I have a feeling my 30's are gonna be pretty fantastical....watch out for ME :o)
LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE




~For we walk by faith, not by sight.~
2 Corinthians 5:7

~TRUST HIM~


phenomenal book...read it (Thanks J!)

MARCH IS COLON CANCER AWARENESS MONTH!!!!!!!!!!! GET A FREAKING COLONOSCOPY PEOPLE!
www.ccalliance.org



Dress in Blue Day is March 4!
Colon cancer is the 2nd leading cause of cancer death in the country, but it doesn’t have to stay this way. Make a difference and help raise awareness for colon cancer by participating Dress in Blue Day on Friday, March 4th. Celebrating Dress in Blue Day is easy and could save a life! Check out our ideas on how you can get involved.
Materials for Dress in Blue Day are now available. Shop CCA to get yours.